I could feel his hand on my hip as he twirled me around as our other hands clap close. I could feel my pulse quicken despite the slow and calm love song playing in the back ground. I could feel a sense of electricity pulsing in the air between us as his warm rough hands gave off a heat that seamed to warm my heart. I probably asked dumb simple questions like, “What is your favorite class?” You have to give me a break, I was only just about to start high school and my flirting skills were at a 0%.
It was that church dance that a mutual friend introduced us and we dance a slow dance together that I knew that this tall dark stranger was someone special. Someone I would want to get to know better. It was that moment that I fell for him and that is where our story began.
This is a story of boy meets girl, but you should know upfront, this is not a love story.
500 Days of Summer is one of my favorite movies. I remember the first time I watched it in college I absolutely hated it. It is a romantic comedy about a man and a woman falling in love… and falling out of love. Why did I want to watch a movie about people falling out of love? Doesn’t that defeat the whole purpose of watching a chick flick? Like I said, I hated it, and here is why…
I had the perfect love story. I liked him for so long before he fell for me. We met at a church dance and emailed back and forth when we went to different schools. We started going on dates and when he moved to my high school we started dating.
This tall dark stranger and I essentially dated through out our high school years. He was extremely romantic and he planned our first kiss a year in advance and it was the most perfect first kiss. We spent every spare moment together and we knew each other better then we had ever known anyone before. We had so many inside jokes and knew exactly how to cheer each other up on a rainy day.
I was over the moon happy and in love with him. I would do anything for him and him me until one day… he didn’t. It took me, sadly, years to admit it to myself that he was pulling away. He started liking and seeing other girls and I tried desperately to move on, but the truth was that I was not able to for the longest time. I always went back to him years after we had broken up.
First love is always the hardest to get over. I knew that and that is why I hated the movie 500 Days of Summer when I first saw it in college. I did not want to let go of the chance that their could still be an us. That our perfect love story would never have a happy ending.
I remember the moment I knew I was officially over him was when I pulled out my white boyfriend box that I kept hidden under my roommate’s and I’s bunk bed. It had some other boyfriend’s things and some random stuff from good dates that never went anywhere but it was mostly filled with tokens for my years together with him. All our inside jokes and memories were in that box along with all my hopes of a future together. I took that box and threw it away in the giant dumpster outside my apartment without a second glance and that is why I knew I was over him.
I am sure a much stronger person would have gotten over a heartbreak like that without as much drama as I did but I was not able to fully move past him until I started dating my husband.
There is a line in the movie after the couple breaks up and she has moved on when the main character asks her about how she was able to marry someone else and she responds, “I woke up one morning and I just knew.”
“What I was never sure of with you.”
Once my husband and I started getting serious I was able to take that white boyfriend box and chuck it like it was another piece of garbage. I knew that my husband was the one. Even though me and this other guy had such wonderful moments together it was not as perfect as I like to remember. We had a lot of fights and he really did not treat me as well as I deserved. He was the right person for that time in high school but I grew up and wanted different things out of my life and became a different person.
Why am I telling you all of this? Well, I don’t know. The thought had just been on my mind that true love is complicated. I still remember him and our time together but now I get a mixture of emotions on those rare occasions that something reminds me of him. I am happy it happened but I am very glad that I have moved on.
I was not someone who found the love of my life on the first try but I have now. We have been through so much together and my husband is the person I want to be with for the rest of my life. We don’t have a perfect relationship either, because that isn’t real, but we get along great and he makes me a better person. He treats me so well and is there for me whenever I need him. I could not be this happy with anyone else.
I guess what I am trying to say is that I want you to know that almost everyone goes through the process of having to get over someone. That is why 500 Days of Summer is such a popular movie! And, as heart breaking as moving on is, its worth it to find the right person.