This was it, this was the moment. This was the place. I felt it so strongly that my heart felt like it was going to leap out of my chest. It was time for me to enter an eating disorder treatment center and I knew the one that I was going to be the best for me. The only problem was that there was $2,000 down payment in order to be admitted.
My husband and I did not have that kind of money lying around. We talked about selling our own possessions but nothing we had was worth that much. No matter how we looked at it, we could not afford the down payment.
I felt so strongly that we needed to ask for help. Now, if you’ve ever asked for money before you know how awkward, embarrassing, and shameful it can be. So, I just pushed the thought out of my mind.
After looking at it from every angle and realizing that there was no other way for me to afford going to treatment, I finally caved. I set up a gofundme account and asked all my friends and family for help. My husband and I were overwhelmed by the amount of support we got! People donated all the money in a week.There are no words to describe how amazing that felt. Let’s just say that I was completely touched and very humbled.
Looking back, that experience actually drew me closer to Christ. I didn’t realize it until I was studying “The Living Christ” section seven, which says:
[The] voice of Jehovah, saying: “I am the first and the last; I am he who liveth, I am he who was slain; I am your advocate with the Father” (D&C 110:3–4).
President Boyd K. Packer explained in his talk “The Mediator” that, “this lesson [to come up financially short] is so valuable because there is a spiritual account, with a balance kept and a settlement due, that no one of us will escape.”
Understanding what it is like come up short on something that is so vital allows us to understand what it will be like to stand before our Heavenly Father on judgment day and again fall short.
“Each of us lives on a kind of spiritual credit. One day the account will be closed, a settlement demanded. However casually we may view it now, when that day comes and the foreclosure is imminent, we will look around in restless agony for someone, anyone, to help us.
“And, by eternal law, mercy cannot be extended save there be one who is both willing and able to assume our debt and pay the price and arrange the terms for our redemption.
“Unless there is a mediator, unless we have a friend, the full weight of justice untempered, unsympathetic, must, positively must fall on us. The full recompense for every transgression, however minor or however deep, will be exacted from us to the uttermost farthing.
“But know this: Truth, glorious truth, proclaims there is such a Mediator.
“‘For there is one God, and one mediator between God and men, the man Christ Jesus.’ (1 Tim. 2:5.)”
Having fallen financially short I know that terror and fear and then relief when it is paid. Because I had that trial I can now better understand my Savior’s role in my salvation. I am so grateful for him and the overwhelming love that he has for me.
Read Day 8 of the 12 Days of CHRISTmas by clicking HERE
Read Day 6 of the 12 Days of CHRISTmas by clicking HERE